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Heartmind Connection Chronicles

February 2007

This month's feature article:

Can Your Best Friend be the Key to Finding Your Life Partner?

Quote of the month:

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.

-- Ralph Waldo Emerson


It’s not too late to join the next 3 month Motivated to Marry™ Tele-Coaching Group held Wednesdays at 9 pm EST.  The next group is being formed n.ow for the end of February 2007.  Sign up before February 25th and get $50 off your first month of coaching. Get affordable coaching and support from others who are in the same boat as you plus monthly personal coaching with me.  Perfect for both s.ingles who have n.ever married and for divorced individuals desiring a lasting long-term relationship.   Go to www.heartmindconnection.com/motivatedtomarry-group-gen.html for more information or email me at coachamy@heartmindconnection.com.


Now Available!  The Motivated to Marry™ Method Book
Jammed packed with tons of
my Motivated to Marry™ wisdoms
Get your copy now at the insider’s price of
$18.95, regularly $24.95 (25% off the listed price)
Shipping and Maryland tax is additional.
Email me at coachamy@heartmindconnection.com
for details. Not available in any store.

Go to www.motivatedtomarry.com and take the quiz,” Are You Motivated to Marry?”, peruse the table of contents and get a sneak preview of one of the chapters.


The next F.ree Motivated to Marry™ Tele-gathering will be February 19th : To Date that person or not to Date- That is the Questions!

Your time is precious. When you go out with a person you have no idea where it may lead. How do you decide to date further or move on? Are you being too picky or not discerning enough? And what does it take to decide to be exclusive? We will discuss this and more! Join us for our lively tele-class.

 To join a tele-gathering all you have to do is call in to the bridge line provided, add your two cents to our monthly topic, or just listen.  Bring your q.uestions, issues and concerns about dating and relationships- Talk with Amy Schoen, Professional Personal Life Coach and Dating and Relationship Expert.

Tele-gatherings take place on the third Monday of the month at 8 p.m. EST– The following one will be on March 19th.  Mark your calendars and come join us!

Sign up at www.heartmindconnection.com under tele-gatherings for the particular month.  (Note: you need to sign up each month for the tele-gathering.  The ph.one number may change from month to month and handouts may be emailed to participants.)


Don’t miss Amy speaking at the following events in the DC area:        

Tuesday, February 6th
Dating Like a Pro!
First Class
Washington, DC
Contact: www.takeaclass.org
Fee

Tuesday, February 27th
How to Jam-Pack Your Business with Clients
First Class
Washington, DC
Contact: www.takeaclass.org
Fee

Do you need a speaker for an event or meeting?  Amy has been accepted as a member of the prestigious National Speakers Association. See her current list of speech topics on www.heartmindconnection.com.  New topics are always being added.  For more information contact Amy at 240-498-7803 or coachamy@heartmindconnection.com.


Amy’s Note: 

February is the month when Valentines Day is celebrated. The Holiday and New Years displays have barely been taken down when you start seeing hearts and cupids all over the place. It is just another reminder that you don’t have someone special in your life right now. It’s a very tough day for s.ingles. How can you make this holiday meaningful to you?

Perhaps there is a child in your life. Kids love this holiday. You can focus on making this a fun Valentines Day for you and your child, niece or nephew, grandchild or special young friend. Perhaps there is a parent, an aunt or uncle, an older cousin or even a grandparent in your life. Spend the day with visiting that person- especially if they are alone themselves. They will appreciate the fuss.

Of course, you have special friends in your life. Think about making plans to see a mushy movie with your girlfriends, hang out at a bar with your buddies or going for a decadent desert. Don’t forget something for your beloved pet. They are there for you through thick and thin.

Last, go buy yourself something special that you have wanted recently. You deserve it. On this holiday it is important to remember all the special “loves” you have in your life.


It’s not too late to start off the New Year with some great wisdom!  101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life. Vol. 2 with John Gray (Men are From Mars…), Jack Canfield (Chicken Soup for the Soul) and yours truly, as co-authors.  There are easy to read short chapters and lots of wonderful tidbits to enhance your life.  Go to http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/?Clk=1583410 and you will get tons of in.credible goodies with your purchase from top self-growth authors.  


Coach Amy Q & A: 

D.ear Coach Amy,

I’m a 58 year old attractive woman who can’t seem to find a man who wants a serious committed relationship leading to marriage. Should I give up trying? Am I being totally unrealistic to expect to find this at my age?

Hopeless in Hempstead

D.ear Hopeless,

First of all, I don’t believe anyone is hopeless. People are getting married at all ages. One of my client’s Mom, in her mid 60’s, met her new husband online. I have met many couples who have met and married in their 50’s, 60’s and 70’s!

The key is to express what you are looking for upfront while you are out there dating or looking to date. Then, date only those who share your desire to find a partner for marriage. One of the clues is to look at their history. Is the potential person used to being in a marriage? How did his last marriage end? A widower who has had a happy marriage will most likely not like being on his own for too long. Some divorced men also prefer to be in a serious relationship and are uncomfortable with being alone.

I do believe if a man has not been married by the time he is 60 years old, I doubt that he will ever want to be married – but you never know!

At later ages, financial concerns come into play-as well as the opinions of grown children who are nervous about their inheritance. If you do find your true love, be smart and open to having a prenuptial agreement or just a “commitment ceremony”. You need to decide on what really matters to you.

If you are truly set on finding a marriage partner, you need to be creative about finding him. I believe the internet can open a lot of avenues to meet eligible men who want the same things you do (See my article on my website, “The Case for Internet Dating in the F.REE area). It all depends on your “weeding” process. You have to decide how long you are willing to be in an exclusive relationship with a man before expecting a commitment or talk about marriage.

If marriage is truly your goal, then you have to stick to your guns and be ready to walk away if you start to feel strung along. Set an acceptable timeframe for you to be in an exclusive relationship before expecting a solid commitment.

You need to have the belief of abundance and that there are plenty of available men out there to date. You have to be willing to get out there and look for them in churches or synagogues, support groups, social activities appropriate for your age group (dances and lectures) and especially online dating. And consider: are you willing to date outside of your particular town or city?

If you hold firm your goal of marriage, and make your expectations known early in the process, the right guy will stick around and meet those expectations. If not, then move on to someone who will!

Best,
Coach Amy 

Please email me at coachamy@heartmindconnection.com with any dating and relationship q.uestions you would like advice on.  Of course, I will keep your name confidential.  If you have q.uestions, others surely have the same q.uestions too!  


Feature Article:

Can Your Best Friend be the Key to Finding Your Life Partner?

Think about your best friend. What makes this person your best friend? How did you best friend become so? When you ponder this, you will see qualities and characteristics on your “wish list” for your soul-mate.

I remember when I met my best friend, Jackie. We had an instant rapport. We liked the same things- fashion, tennis, and dancing. We liked working out together. We also enjoyed musicals and concerts. She was willing to go hear Country Music with me and to go Zydeco dancing. (Not typical activities for an East Coast girl!).

She had an openness to try new things like a new restaurant. We traveled really well together. We even sang Shania Twain songs on the radio out loud together while driving in the car. We were the milder version of Thelma and Louise!

She is very easy to talk to and an hour could pass quickly on the ph.one or anywhere. There is a flow, a positive energy.

Jackie is not pretentious. I can confide in her and know it will not go any further. I can trust her. She has backed me up when some other women were nasty to me. I know I can count on her in tough times. She came to visit me the night before I had to put my cat to sleep.

When I think of the values, qualities and characteristics of my best friend, those are the same things I wanted in a mate.

Article continued below:


New! Join the next 3 month Motivated to Marry™ Tele-Coaching Group held Wednesdays at 9 pm EST.  The next group is being formed now for the end of  January 2007.  Sign up before December 31st and get $100 off your first month of coaching.  Get affordable coaching and support from others who are in the same boat as you plus monthly personal coaching with me.  Perfect for both singles who have never married and for divorced individuals desiring a lasting long-term relationship.   Go to www.heartmindconnection.com/motivatedtomarry-group-gen.html for more information or email me at coachamy@heartmindconnection.com.

Learn how to improve your dating skills and relationships with Coach Amy

I have discovered the best way to know what you need and want in a relationship and life overall is through personal life coaching (I have my own life coach too!).  Learn how to attract the right person to you or become clear on whether your current relationship is the right one for you.  

Call me for an exploratory conversation to learn how I can help you. 

It’s not too late to Join the next 3 month Motivated to Marry™ Tele-Coaching Group held Wednesdays at 9 pm EST.  The next group is being formed n.ow for the end of February 2007.  Sign up before February 25th and get $50 off your first month of coaching. Get affordable coaching and support from others who are in the same boat as you plus monthly personal coaching with me.  Perfect for both s.ingles who have n.ever married and for divorced individuals desiring a lasting long-term relationship.   Go to www.heartmindconnection.com/motivatedtomarry-group-gen.html for more information or email me at coachamy@heartmindconnection.com.

Stop complaining and get the romantic relationship and the life you have always dreamed of.   Reach those goals you say you want to make.  Give yourself the gift of one to one personal life coaching – it will last a l.ifetime!  Daytime hours are available during the week from 8 a.m. with my last appointment at 5 p.m.  I am like a personal trainer for your life. I challenge my clients to reach and exceed their goals. Take action today!

www.heartmindconnection.com/coaching_services.html .


H.ere are some of my testi-monials about my coaching:

“With Amy’s coaching, I accomplished more in a half month’s time than a half year’s time in Therapy! I was able to put to use immediately the insights and knowledge that I had gained from our sessions. Now I feel more empowered in dealing with both work and personal relationships. Thanks Amy, you’re the best!” -- Patricia Bethesda, MD

“Amy’s coaching helped me clarify my values and solidify my decision making leading me to navigate my own course more successfully both personally and in business. All of that happened in two and a half months.”  -- Ben, Bethesda MD

“Amy has been a life-saver!  She helped me clarify my values and to focus on living a more values honored life, especially with regard to my entrepreneurial endeavors and my personal relationships”

-- Paul, Alexandria VA (Married in May 2005)

“Amy’s impactful qu.estions dramatically shifted my perspective on marriage and the type of man that would truly make me happy.  This process opened me up to meeting my fiancé.”

-- Robin, Bethesda, MD (engaged to be married April 2007)

“Amy focused me on the areas of my life that needed improvement and gave me the tools to reinforce that focus.  Together we came up with creative solutions to problems and strategies to accomplish my goals.  I highly recommend Amy as a personal life coach for anyone who feels frustrated with the dating world.”

-- Stewart, New York, NY (married August 2006) 

“Amy has definitely helped me have more self confidence in myself to go out into the dating world and take more risks.”

                        -- Sue, Rockville, MD


Article continued from above:

I hear from my clients and those I have interviewed, “I want my husband or wife to be my best friend”. My married interviewees tell me “My husband (or wife) is my best friend.”

My husband is also a best friend. Ok, we don’t talk about fashion; however, we do have a similar mindset and values. We enjoy many of the same activities. I also feel secure and trust him with my deepest secrets.

Of course, a major difference between my best girlfriend and my husband is that there is a physical chemistry – an attraction to my husband and romantic feelings.

As you go looking for your life partner, keep in mind what attracts you to your best friends. That will give you clues to what kind of person would make a great romantic partner for you. Seek out venues that attract the same kind of person.

When I think back, I met Jackie at a singles biking group. That’s also where I found my husband! So go to where your best friend and you would be most likely to be hanging out. You may just meet your true love there.


To read articles from my previous monthly ezines go to: www.heartmindconnection.com/free.html

Get Amy’s Expert On-line Dating Profile Review -- Only $99!

Attract the right people to your online dating profile.  Improve the number and quality of responses to your profile.  I have you fill out an in depth questionnaire to pinpoint what’s really important for you to convey.  Remember, you attract what you put out there!  Sign up on www.Heartmindconnection.com/profile_review.html

Amy’s review was so helpful!  She took the best of me and made me shine!  Finally, the kinds of men I want to meet are now contacting me.  Thanks Amy!

-- Penny, Reston, VA

What a help Amy has been to me! First, we figured out what online dating sites best for me to put up my profile. And, because of the work we did upfront on my values and goals, and describing me in a truly representative way, the women I am meeting are responding very positively to my inquiries.  I am finding that I am meeting more quality women that resonate with me better than my previous attempts with online dating.

-- Joe (54) Rockville, MD

Amy’s terrific!  Her suggestions were right on target.  I now have included things I hold d.ear and have edited out comments that were in my ad that I now see prevented men from contacting me. The response to my ad has definitely improved.

-- Tania, Silver Springs, MD


Questions?

Have a question about relationships or how you can get what you truly want and need out of life? www.heartmindconnection.com/coaching_services.html

Get Dating and Relationship Tips

If you haven’t done so already, sign up for the newsletter, “Heartmind Connections” to receive more articles on dating and relationships like this.  As a sign up bonus, you’ll receive the sought after article “18 Personalities to avoid in the Dating Pool”, not offered anywhere but h.ere. www.heartmindconnection.com/free.html

Help your Friends/Help Yourself:

I’ll be happy to send them my “Heartmind Connections” e-newsletter.  Send them a note about this e-newsletter at www.heartmindconnection.com/tell_a_friend.html  so they too can discover their best possible life!  Then you will get my popular MP3:“He Said-She Said Teleclass on Dating” as a thank you.


If you enjoyed this newsletter, please pass it along to your friends and associates.

Do you enjoy reading the latest monthly Heartmind Connections ezine?  I would love to hear your comments on my ezine and any suggestions you may have for future issues. You may contact me at: coachamy@heartmindconnection.com.  Please feel f.ree to forward to any of your friends who may be interested in learning more about dating and relationships.

Amy’s Vision:

“As a personal life coach, my goal is to bring you the information you need to make intelligent and heartfelt decisions about the most significant relationship in your life. We all desire our best life possible. My hope is that you find this information helpful and achieve all your life long dreams.”

Amy Schoen, CPCC
Heartmind Connection™
Life Coach and Dating & Relationship Expert
Helping singles discover their best possible lives!
240-498-7803
Rockville, Maryland
www.heartmindconnection.com

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Amy’s current speeches:

How to Get Out There and Date-Again!

5 Simple Steps to Creating Your Most Fulfilling Life

Dating Like A Pro!

Learn to Date the Motivated to Marry™ Method

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Amy Schoen’s Story

“The coaching work I did was invaluable
in understanding myself, my key values, my life goals and the type of partner who would be my best possible fit...”

Read Amy’s Story

Amy Schoen’s Story

“The coaching work I did was invaluable
in understanding myself, my key values, my life goals and the type of partner who would be my best possible fit...”

Read Amy’s Story